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Posts Tagged ‘nurture’

So, if you are a regular reader of my blog you know that we just had a daughter.  My wife had a very long arduous pregnancy and we are so glad that it is over.  Besides the end of pregnancy we have our wonderful new daughter, Violet.  Violet is currently sleeping next to me as I type this, and hopefully she will let me finish it before the night is done.  Her mom is sleeping and getting some needed rest.  If you still haven’t read the detailed adventure of my daughter’s birth, I encourage you to do so (https://sincejuniorhigh.wordpress.com/2010/08/07/pregnant-no-mo/).

I love this picture of Violet. I think she has beautiful eyes.

While they were still in the hospital, recovering, my oldest son, Brett asked if we could celebrate the arrival of Violet.  I told him that is an awesome idea.  We bought flowers, cupcakes, and Violet had presents for the boys.  We decided to have a REAL birthday party.  A party to celebrate the birth of Violet.

I don’t know if other people throw birthday parties at someone’s birth, but they should.  I think this should become the cultural norm.  Our two boys open up presents.  Brett also opened an envelope containing ten dollars for winning the bet of when Violet would actually be born.  We all sang happy birthday and had a great time eating cupcakes.  And instead of the birthday girl getting gifts, since she is technically zero, her brothers get gifts from her.
Isaac receives a Batman and Sandman from his new sister.

It is kind of like a reverse birthday, but I think it is more of a birthday than a traditional one because someone was actually born.  It was very cool.

With the arrival of my daughter I am also struck by how soon personality seems to be evident.  She is already clearly different from her two brothers, and I know it is early, but I am certain that she is strong.  Another strong-willed person in our family may make the teenage years unbearable.  It will be very important to practice my good guy routine.  You know, me and her versus mommy.  That sounds right.  But it is got me thinking, how much of who we are is set at day one?
This is an old argument, right?  Nature versus nurture?  However, if you have kids, I am sure you will agree with me, personality began to show itself super early, maybe as early as day one.  It is also no surprise to me that girls are different from boys, something I plan on posting about in the future.  But for now, I will just say that we treat girls different from the get go.  For example, literally 95% of my daughter’s clothing is pink.  Who made this choice?  Why does a girl have to wear pink?  I am sick of pink already and she is only three days old.  I love my boys, but my daughter already gets more attention then they ever got.  Say what you want about gender issues, but we begin the process of differentiation as soon as we can.  I promise you this, if I buy clothes for my daughter, it will NOT be pink.
Well, I better go, she is beginning to stir.  I will leave you with this.  I love my daughter, but if you are reading this and you are considering having three or more kids, even a little thought that might be in your brain, believe me when I say this — “DON’T DO IT! IT’S TOO MANY KIDS!!!”  We no longer have one-on-one, but we are playing zone.  It’s crazy, but I love her.
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Every person that sees me has asked about the birth.  I’m at least glad she is born so I no longer get, “Is the baby here yet?”  But why are the details sooo important and why must we talk for five minutes about the birth?  I don’t know you and you want to know how long the labor was, how much she weighed, how long was she, did my wife tear during the birthing process.  OK, I made up the last one, (She did not by the way), but I am surprised at how much information people think they are entitled to when it comes to babies.  What’s up with that?  Oh and by the way, 7pm-3:13am, 8lbs and 11oz, 19.5 inches long.  You happy? I’m just sayin …
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